where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
My brain says no but my pants say off.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
