Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
