I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
My vagina just recognized that song.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
