Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
