too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
