My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
You may now shotgun with the bride
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Randomize
