i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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