i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
