you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
