I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Even my vagina gasped.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
