she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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