good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
