singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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