Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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