I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
