glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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