bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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