its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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