We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
