ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
