So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
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