I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
