I wanna bring you to show and tell
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
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