She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I still have a little drunk in my system
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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