My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
