Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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