I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
