I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
