Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Randomize
