who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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