I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
