I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Randomize
