But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
