Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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