Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
