Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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