I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i just google imaged poop.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
