? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
