Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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