I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
