I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
My brain says no but my pants say off.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
