Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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