We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
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