girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
it glows. i had to have it.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
