Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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