I think i peed on brittanys purse
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
