Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
