Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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