I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Randomize
