How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
In other news, I just burned my penis
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Randomize
