If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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